For the last several weeks, Madison’s class at school has been practicing their kickball skills getting ready for the big game (in front of her whole high school) against Centennial High School. I’ve got to admit, I was equal parts excited and nervous.

Maybe more like scared instead of nervous.

As it turns, out the nervousness (scaredness…?) was unnecessary. She and her team did great. Everything was uneventful (with the exception of the seizure right before the National Anthem…) and she had a great time.

I think in my nervousness I realized something. I work real hard at making sure she is comfortable, that things go as easily as possible for her. Part of that comes from understanding her limitations and wanting to protect her against situations that would make her uncomfortable or unsafe.

Part of it may come from not wanting to upset the apple cart.

But maybe I am too cautious.

Maybe I don’t give her enough credit and challenge her a bit more than I do.

I think part of the caution is a result of seeing a thousand train wrecks before. I’ve seen her melt down or lock up or get nervous and so maybe I think “Let’s just keep everything as it is, we know what works, what routine is good, and SAFE.”

After all, a big concern I have is in keeping her safe.

Maybe, after seeing how well she did with the game and the crowd and the noise and all the “new” of the event, maybe I need to give trust her a little but more to some different things.Maybe I need to trust me to trust her to do some more things

For the last several weeks, Madison’s class at school has been practicing their kickball skills getting ready for the big game against Centennial. I’ve got to admit, I was equal parts excited and nervous.

Maybe more like scared instead of nervous.

As it turns, out the nervousness (scaredness…?) was unnecessary. She and her team did great. Everything was uneventful (with the exception of the seizure right before the National Anthem…) and she had a great time.

I think in my nervousness I realized something. I work real hard at making sure she is comfortable, that things go as easily as possible for her. Part of that comes from understanding her limitations and wanting to protect her against situations that would make her uncomfortable or unsafe.

Part of it may come from not wanting to upset the apple cart.

But maybe I am too cautious.

Maybe I don’t give her enough credit and challenge her a bit more than I do.

I think part of the caution is a result of seeing a thousand train wrecks before. I’ve seen her melt down or lock up or get nervous and so maybe I think “Let’s just keep everything as it is, we know what works, what routine is good, and SAFE.”

After all, a big concern I have is in keeping her safe.

Maybe, after seeing how well she did with the game and the crowd and the noise and all the “new” of the event, maybe I need to give trust her a little but more to some different things.

Maybe I need to trust me to trust her to do some more things…